Recently, I was watching a video on YouTube in which the well known, David Icke was speaking about a number of sujects that resonated with me very much. One of the things he mentioned was education, and how things really are regarding it. In this blogpost I'm going to talk about some of the things he said and state my own opinion in amongst them.
Education. What comes to mind when you hear that word? Teachers? Books? Learning? Blackboards and pens? Principals and horrible cafeteria food? That's all very well, but what are all those things really? They are camoflauge to hide the bare facts of what education truly is. Effectively, when you come of age, you are sent to school in which you learn how to read, write, play and socialise. This continues, but as you grow older and move onto harder work and less play, education is nothing more than a competition and mind control.
Students are fed information over and over again. They're repetitively taught the same information until it's grounded in the logical side of their brain (left side). When exam time rolls around, students are expected to regurgitate the information from the left side of their brains that they've spent months learning onto an exam paper. An throughout this whole process, the children are not taught to think and question this information while using the creative side of the brain to come to their own opinion about it. Really, education is saying, "Don't question, just regurgitate the information!"
I now want to address the competitive side of education. Because I myself attend school, I am a witness to this very nature that education presents. All through your school life you're encouraged to be the best, get the best marks, climb higher up the ladder and don't stop for anything or anyone. It's cold, hard competition that is staring us in the face but is camoflauged. Any why be the best? Well, so you can get a good job that earns you money so you can buy nice things. And then you try to climb up the ladder in your work life too, so you can be the best and achieve. All to gain what? What can you possibly gain that's worth something from doing so?
Wednesday 30 December 2009
Sunday 27 December 2009
Connect With The Earth
Money, money, they’re all in it to win it.
Am I supposed to believe
This printed paper is worth something?
Like robots we roll through the industrious streets,
Ignoring those around us and focusing only
On what we need to buy with what’s in our wallets.
I want trace back my roots and gather what the Earth has given us,
Collecting wild berries, nuts, harvesting crops and breathing the plentiful oxygen.
Forests are the remnants of this once new born planet long ago.
If only the same compassion burned within us,
As factories burn material which in turn emits toxic fumes.
She is dying, and we know it, but ignore her cry for help.
Am I supposed to believe
This printed paper is worth something?
Like robots we roll through the industrious streets,
Ignoring those around us and focusing only
On what we need to buy with what’s in our wallets.
I want trace back my roots and gather what the Earth has given us,
Collecting wild berries, nuts, harvesting crops and breathing the plentiful oxygen.
Forests are the remnants of this once new born planet long ago.
If only the same compassion burned within us,
As factories burn material which in turn emits toxic fumes.
She is dying, and we know it, but ignore her cry for help.
Wednesday 23 December 2009
A Spiritual Lucid Dream?
Monday 21/12/09 – Tuesday 22/12/09
Bed time: 11:50pm
Wake up time: 6:00am, then slept in until 7:49am
Lucid: Yes
Total hours slept: 9hrs 29 mins
Dream: I was floating in total darkness. In fact, it felt like I was floating in a void, in nothingness, there was only black surrounding me. I was floating in an almost “Jesus position” with my body straight, my face looking upwards and my arms several inches from my sides. The bizarre thing was that I was completely and utterly naked. And at the time, I didn’t feel embarrassed or conscious of it. It felt natural.
Suddenly, I started feeling these mild vibrations tingling all over my body. It was the strangest sensation I’ve ever felt in all of my life. I wasn’t frightened by this when it was occurring; again, it felt natural and comforting. After several seconds of the vibrations, without warning this bright white light burst from every inch of my body. The bright light was emanating from me, and it was so bright, that I looked like a huge ball of energy. The original colour of my flesh was no longer there, I was a human shaped white core. The mild vibrations were still there, but got no stronger and I felt as if I was sending out positive energy into the darkness that surrounded me. That's the strong sense I had.
It was very hard to hold onto the dream, and although I was lucid, I had no control over the content; therefore I couldn't rub my hands together to prolong it (a common tactic to prolong a dream). I could feel my lucidity wanting to drop from layer 3, to layer 1, in which layer you usually wake up at. Strangely though, the dream just faded away, but I didn’t awake, I moved onto another dream, in which I was not lucid.
Some people may consider this a spiritual dream with my higher being/spirit guide, others my think it was just a dream. Who knows? But it was beyond anything I'd ever felt before.
Bed time: 11:50pm
Wake up time: 6:00am, then slept in until 7:49am
Lucid: Yes
Total hours slept: 9hrs 29 mins
Dream: I was floating in total darkness. In fact, it felt like I was floating in a void, in nothingness, there was only black surrounding me. I was floating in an almost “Jesus position” with my body straight, my face looking upwards and my arms several inches from my sides. The bizarre thing was that I was completely and utterly naked. And at the time, I didn’t feel embarrassed or conscious of it. It felt natural.
Suddenly, I started feeling these mild vibrations tingling all over my body. It was the strangest sensation I’ve ever felt in all of my life. I wasn’t frightened by this when it was occurring; again, it felt natural and comforting. After several seconds of the vibrations, without warning this bright white light burst from every inch of my body. The bright light was emanating from me, and it was so bright, that I looked like a huge ball of energy. The original colour of my flesh was no longer there, I was a human shaped white core. The mild vibrations were still there, but got no stronger and I felt as if I was sending out positive energy into the darkness that surrounded me. That's the strong sense I had.
It was very hard to hold onto the dream, and although I was lucid, I had no control over the content; therefore I couldn't rub my hands together to prolong it (a common tactic to prolong a dream). I could feel my lucidity wanting to drop from layer 3, to layer 1, in which layer you usually wake up at. Strangely though, the dream just faded away, but I didn’t awake, I moved onto another dream, in which I was not lucid.
Some people may consider this a spiritual dream with my higher being/spirit guide, others my think it was just a dream. Who knows? But it was beyond anything I'd ever felt before.
Lucid Dreaming Challenge Update
As you may already know, I've been attempting to master the "art" of lucid dreaming. I've been trying to achieve this for a total of 12 days, and so far, it's been more promising than I originally thought it would be. From day 1 until now, I've had about 4-5 lucid dreams, a religious dream and a spiritual dream (which I had just two nights ago). This is very significant, because I'm the person who couldn't even recall having any dreams in let's say a week or even a month! I feel so enlightened and encouraged by them, even at this minor stage.
I watch a guy who's an oneironaut* on YouTube by the name of "ReeceJones87", and one thing I remember him saying is, "Don't give up enlightenment for lucidity..." Basically, he means that you shouldn't forget about interpreting your dreams, even the non-lucid ones, all to gain the power of lucidity. In the end, it would be a pointless climb if you ignored the important information your dreams give you.
*An oneironaut is a person who explores dream worlds, usually associated with lucid dreaming
So, I guess you could say this challenge is going superbly. My dream recall is getting stronger every day. I used to not be able to remember any of my dreams, but now I can remember around one or two per night. In the spiritual dream I had two nights ago, I felt things I'd never felt before in the entirety of my life. It was extraordinary and definately something I'm going to share either on my new YouTube account, (1ThinkOutsideTheBox1) or here on this very blog.
Oh and about my new YouTube account, I'll give you a quick run down of what it entails by letting you read an exerpt from my YouTube channel:
"Welcome to my channel, 1ThinkOutsideTheBox1. Here, I'll be displaying my videos on spirituality, religion, lucidity, dreaming and many other topics. If you wish to have a discussion or chat with me on the subjects, feel free to message me via YouTube.
I was born into a rather strict Christian family where I was indoctrinated to believe that there is such a being named God, who sent his son Jesus Christ down from heaven to Earth to save us from our sins. Because of this early push into Christianity, you can imagine the difficulty I have in believing otherwise. That is not to say I am rooted to the spot in my beliefs. I welcome change with open arms, but I will look at that change with sceptical eyes, as I refuse to self-delude myself with foolish theories.
My goal is to seek the truth through questioning that in which I've been brought up to believe. To open my mind to theories without being naive and self-deluding myself. I seek to interpret my dreams for enlightenment and greatest of all, gain fulfillment in what I choose to believe as the truth."
I watch a guy who's an oneironaut* on YouTube by the name of "ReeceJones87", and one thing I remember him saying is, "Don't give up enlightenment for lucidity..." Basically, he means that you shouldn't forget about interpreting your dreams, even the non-lucid ones, all to gain the power of lucidity. In the end, it would be a pointless climb if you ignored the important information your dreams give you.
*An oneironaut is a person who explores dream worlds, usually associated with lucid dreaming
So, I guess you could say this challenge is going superbly. My dream recall is getting stronger every day. I used to not be able to remember any of my dreams, but now I can remember around one or two per night. In the spiritual dream I had two nights ago, I felt things I'd never felt before in the entirety of my life. It was extraordinary and definately something I'm going to share either on my new YouTube account, (1ThinkOutsideTheBox1) or here on this very blog.
Oh and about my new YouTube account, I'll give you a quick run down of what it entails by letting you read an exerpt from my YouTube channel:
"Welcome to my channel, 1ThinkOutsideTheBox1. Here, I'll be displaying my videos on spirituality, religion, lucidity, dreaming and many other topics. If you wish to have a discussion or chat with me on the subjects, feel free to message me via YouTube.
I was born into a rather strict Christian family where I was indoctrinated to believe that there is such a being named God, who sent his son Jesus Christ down from heaven to Earth to save us from our sins. Because of this early push into Christianity, you can imagine the difficulty I have in believing otherwise. That is not to say I am rooted to the spot in my beliefs. I welcome change with open arms, but I will look at that change with sceptical eyes, as I refuse to self-delude myself with foolish theories.
My goal is to seek the truth through questioning that in which I've been brought up to believe. To open my mind to theories without being naive and self-deluding myself. I seek to interpret my dreams for enlightenment and greatest of all, gain fulfillment in what I choose to believe as the truth."
Monday 21 December 2009
A Bizarre Religious Dream Last Night (Part of Lucid Dreaming Challenge)
Sunday 20/12/09 (night) – Monday 21/12/09 (morning)
Lucid: Possibly?
Bed time: 11:30pm
Wake up time: 6:00am (then slept in until 9:04am)
Total hours slept: 9hrs 34 mins
Dream: I was walking in a local shopping mall that’s in my town with my two sisters, mother and father. It was so much busier than usual, there was people everywhere pushing into us. As I looked around there was a man in his twenties preaching about God as he walked with his friends. He had long blonde hair, was wearing a woollen hat and had a black coat that reached down to the floor. He was yelling quotes from the Bible, and I think one of them was from the book of John. Anyways it was something along the lines that God forgives and knows all of our sins. Then I heard him say, “Isn’t that amazing?!” I can remember thinking, “I’ve heard this all before, I don’t want to hear anymore.”
And as I was looking around at everyone, I could instantly tell their religious status, (i.e I could tell if they were Christians or not, just by looking at them). As we continued walking, my family and I turned to the left to a shop. The sign above the store read, “Superdrug” (the name of a common drug store here in Northern Ireland). Although, inside there were masses and masses of Bibles, all different shapes and sizes and colours, that were stacked on the shop shelves. People were swarming all around them. So we entered and all of a sudden, my sister and I sat down and had a conversation about my life. I distinctly remember telling her about my doubts in religion and every emotion I’d ever felt (particularly depression, although when she asked me did I suffer from depression, I said “No, it’s more stress than depression.”) Depression seemed to be there for a reason because the day before in reality, I attended a church service. A Canadian pastor had visited and was preaching. On of the things he said was this, “I think depression is not an illness, it’s a state of mind.”
Okay, so back to the dream, my sister and I were interrupted by something that I felt was very important once I’d woken up. But as we turned around to see, my dream faded to an end.
Lucid: Possibly?
Bed time: 11:30pm
Wake up time: 6:00am (then slept in until 9:04am)
Total hours slept: 9hrs 34 mins
Dream: I was walking in a local shopping mall that’s in my town with my two sisters, mother and father. It was so much busier than usual, there was people everywhere pushing into us. As I looked around there was a man in his twenties preaching about God as he walked with his friends. He had long blonde hair, was wearing a woollen hat and had a black coat that reached down to the floor. He was yelling quotes from the Bible, and I think one of them was from the book of John. Anyways it was something along the lines that God forgives and knows all of our sins. Then I heard him say, “Isn’t that amazing?!” I can remember thinking, “I’ve heard this all before, I don’t want to hear anymore.”
And as I was looking around at everyone, I could instantly tell their religious status, (i.e I could tell if they were Christians or not, just by looking at them). As we continued walking, my family and I turned to the left to a shop. The sign above the store read, “Superdrug” (the name of a common drug store here in Northern Ireland). Although, inside there were masses and masses of Bibles, all different shapes and sizes and colours, that were stacked on the shop shelves. People were swarming all around them. So we entered and all of a sudden, my sister and I sat down and had a conversation about my life. I distinctly remember telling her about my doubts in religion and every emotion I’d ever felt (particularly depression, although when she asked me did I suffer from depression, I said “No, it’s more stress than depression.”) Depression seemed to be there for a reason because the day before in reality, I attended a church service. A Canadian pastor had visited and was preaching. On of the things he said was this, “I think depression is not an illness, it’s a state of mind.”
Okay, so back to the dream, my sister and I were interrupted by something that I felt was very important once I’d woken up. But as we turned around to see, my dream faded to an end.
Sunday 20 December 2009
Is the Bible Really the Truth?
Is the content of the Holy Bible really true? Can we honestly say that Jesus Christ did exist just because a book says so?
I’ve heard pastor’s preaching in the past that we know God exists because we have his holy word, the Bible. In the Bible it says that God inspired writers to document everything that is written in the very book. When I sit in a church service and hear that, I can’t help but laugh to myself. How on earth do you expect to convert someone to Christianity by telling them that this random book which was written thousands of years ago (that might not even be true), proves the existence of a being whom we can’t even see? It's not the ideal way to guide someone into a decision that has a dramatic affect on their life.
Now, the bible is unquestionably the world's all-time bestseller with countless millions of copies in print, but there is no proof whatsoever that the events which are mentioned in the book actually happened. So many people root themselves to the belief that the Bible is true, when they can’t even give any solid evidence that this is so. Usually, they'll just quote the Bible again! It’s like saying, “I receive presents on Christmas morning every year, so Santa Claus does exist!” It’s self-deluding, and I’ve never been capable of putting all my faith into a "possibly" true book.
If Christians expect people to automatically put all of their trust into the words in a book, they've got a lot to learn. I for one, can't do so.
I’ve heard pastor’s preaching in the past that we know God exists because we have his holy word, the Bible. In the Bible it says that God inspired writers to document everything that is written in the very book. When I sit in a church service and hear that, I can’t help but laugh to myself. How on earth do you expect to convert someone to Christianity by telling them that this random book which was written thousands of years ago (that might not even be true), proves the existence of a being whom we can’t even see? It's not the ideal way to guide someone into a decision that has a dramatic affect on their life.
Now, the bible is unquestionably the world's all-time bestseller with countless millions of copies in print, but there is no proof whatsoever that the events which are mentioned in the book actually happened. So many people root themselves to the belief that the Bible is true, when they can’t even give any solid evidence that this is so. Usually, they'll just quote the Bible again! It’s like saying, “I receive presents on Christmas morning every year, so Santa Claus does exist!” It’s self-deluding, and I’ve never been capable of putting all my faith into a "possibly" true book.
If Christians expect people to automatically put all of their trust into the words in a book, they've got a lot to learn. I for one, can't do so.
Gig on Saturday Night Tale
Last night I had the amazing opportunity to sing and play guitar at a concert. Over the past two weeks I'd been practising for it and getting a song ready. So, yesterday I had to bring my guitar down to the gig to have a practise and a sound check at 5:30pm. So, I arrived, got out my guitar, sat on a stool, hooked up some microphones, and sang. Then the sound crew adjusted the volume etc and when I had finished, I sat back down with my two friends I had come with. At this stage, I was feeling pretty good because the practise run had went very well. My friends and I sat watching the crew adjust lights, mics, and other band members were practising too. Then, 7:30pm came, the start of the concert. I was supposed to go on stage and perform after the band had played a few songs.
As we were all sitting listening, my mouth and throat turned so dry it was unbelievable. And come to think of it, I didn't FEEL nervous, but obviously that's not how my body felt. This was the third time I'd ever performed to a large number of people. So I was sitting there, getting more anxious by the minute with my mouth and throat turning into the Saharah Desert. Until it was my turn to perform...
I walked onto the stage, picked up my guitar and sat on the same stool again. One member of the crew fixed the mics for me and then I began singing. It was going well, although the driness of my mouth made it very hard to sing properly. I sang the first verse and the chorus perfectly. Next was the second verse...I forgot the lyrics! So I simply starting smiling, playing it cool, and continued playing. I sang the rest of the song perfectly.
Of course I was somewhat disappointed that I screwed up a little, but my cousin who organised the concert said that she didn't even realise I had forgotten the lyrics, and she knew the song so well herself! If a person who knows a song so well and can't even tell that I'd messed up the words, the rest of the crowd probably knew no better either! Bingo! Oh, and another thing: a girl whom I didn't even know, walked up to me, hugged me and toldme that I did a good job performing! Can you believe that?!
So overall, it was a good night. I didn't go to bed until after midnight and then this morning I had to wake up early and be brought to church (unwillingly). What I did all afternoon and this evening? Well, my friend and I built a snowman then went to their house and watched some movies. Now I'm back here blogging and surfing YouTube as usual.
As we were all sitting listening, my mouth and throat turned so dry it was unbelievable. And come to think of it, I didn't FEEL nervous, but obviously that's not how my body felt. This was the third time I'd ever performed to a large number of people. So I was sitting there, getting more anxious by the minute with my mouth and throat turning into the Saharah Desert. Until it was my turn to perform...
I walked onto the stage, picked up my guitar and sat on the same stool again. One member of the crew fixed the mics for me and then I began singing. It was going well, although the driness of my mouth made it very hard to sing properly. I sang the first verse and the chorus perfectly. Next was the second verse...I forgot the lyrics! So I simply starting smiling, playing it cool, and continued playing. I sang the rest of the song perfectly.
Of course I was somewhat disappointed that I screwed up a little, but my cousin who organised the concert said that she didn't even realise I had forgotten the lyrics, and she knew the song so well herself! If a person who knows a song so well and can't even tell that I'd messed up the words, the rest of the crowd probably knew no better either! Bingo! Oh, and another thing: a girl whom I didn't even know, walked up to me, hugged me and toldme that I did a good job performing! Can you believe that?!
So overall, it was a good night. I didn't go to bed until after midnight and then this morning I had to wake up early and be brought to church (unwillingly). What I did all afternoon and this evening? Well, my friend and I built a snowman then went to their house and watched some movies. Now I'm back here blogging and surfing YouTube as usual.
Thursday 17 December 2009
Writers and Trains
In my head I collect all these ideas of what the ideal writer should do and be. I know it's kind've stupid, as every writer is unique, but often when I'm day dreaming I just imagine this person who loves to write more than anything. So, in this blog post, I've decided to share one of many thoughts on what I think is the ideal writer. You may find this completely useless or uninteresting, and some may not, but here goes...
Okay, to start things off, let's talk about writers and trains. Picture this, a man is sitting by himself on a train with a notebook laid on the table and a pen in his hand. Also sitting on the table is a coffee from 'StarBucks' and he's gazing out the window watching the countryside fly past him in smudges of greens. He appears to be deep in thought, and you just know he's writing a story, or a poem or just random notes.
I personally adore trains. They're quiet, comfortable and ideas or inspirations will often hit me when travelling on one. The idea of this person who's far out and just drifts away from everyone through thought, is fascinating to me. Someone who's different and observes the world around them instead of getting caught up in the hustle and bustle of daily life. Someone who can just chill out and have a coffee while writing down whatever comes into their head.
There's this great song by Jon Foreman called, "Southbound Train", and in an inteview, Jon said something along the lines that he was going home on a train and he wrote a song about his long journey there. If you look it up on YouTube, you should find it. It's very unwinding to listen to after a long day.
Anyways, I hope these short thoughts kept you interested for a while. Maybe I'll share more thoughts on the subject in the future. Who knows?
Okay, to start things off, let's talk about writers and trains. Picture this, a man is sitting by himself on a train with a notebook laid on the table and a pen in his hand. Also sitting on the table is a coffee from 'StarBucks' and he's gazing out the window watching the countryside fly past him in smudges of greens. He appears to be deep in thought, and you just know he's writing a story, or a poem or just random notes.
I personally adore trains. They're quiet, comfortable and ideas or inspirations will often hit me when travelling on one. The idea of this person who's far out and just drifts away from everyone through thought, is fascinating to me. Someone who's different and observes the world around them instead of getting caught up in the hustle and bustle of daily life. Someone who can just chill out and have a coffee while writing down whatever comes into their head.
There's this great song by Jon Foreman called, "Southbound Train", and in an inteview, Jon said something along the lines that he was going home on a train and he wrote a song about his long journey there. If you look it up on YouTube, you should find it. It's very unwinding to listen to after a long day.
Anyways, I hope these short thoughts kept you interested for a while. Maybe I'll share more thoughts on the subject in the future. Who knows?
Sunday 13 December 2009
Lucid Dreaming
Through the aid of YouTube and the internet, I've become very much aware of the concept of lucidity. I've been researching a lot over the past few days on the subject, and have made the conscious decision to become a lucid dreamer. First and foremost, it would make more sense to tell you what lucid dreaming is, although you probably know already.
Lucid dreaming- Being in a state where you are dreaming and are fully aware that you are.
So, basically, knowing that you're dreaming. Depending on the level of lucidity you're in, you will be capable of having full control of what goes on in your dream. I'm not going to go into the all the levels of lucidity at present, but I'll probably touch on them at a later stage. For now, I'm going to talk about the journey I'm going to take to become a lucid dreamer.
NOTE: In the challenge that I'm currently taking, I do not desire to have OOBE (out of body experiences) or anything of an occult nature. Rather I simply wish to experience the extraordinary capability of lucid dreaming, and the personal enlightenment from interpreting my dreams and becoming aware of my dream signs through doing so.
Okay, now that that's out of the way, let's begin. One of the key things that is recommended to anyone who wishes to lucid dream, is a dream journal. Basically it's a diary that you keep near your bed at all times. That way, having woken up from a lucid dream/dream, you can quickly jot them down before you forget them. I now have a dream journal that stays beneath my pillow and I've been trying to record my dreams in it for about three days.
Many people don't remember their dreams and find it hard to record them (me included),that is because our brains have gotten so used to forgeting, that they're stuck in their ways. To have a stronger dream recall (term used to express remembering your dreams), you must train your mind to remember. Creating the intent in your mind to consciously remember your dreams. To do so, you can think very hard about recalling your dreams, wanting to become lucid and doing reality checks. It's all about intent.
You'll have noticed that I said "reality checks" there. What are they? Well, it's basically a check you do to ensure you that you are/are not dreaming. To become lucid you need to practice these reality checks even through the day so that your mind is so used to checking, that it will do it in it's sleep. Below are a few common reality checks:
1. Observing your hand- often in the dream world, your hand will not look like an ordinary hand. It could be discoloured, deformed etc. From seeing that your hand doesn't look normal, you'll realise that you're in a dream.
2. Holding your nose and closing your mouth- This is a test to see if you can breathe without the aid of a nose or mouth. In the dream world, you can usually breathe without them, thus you'll be able to tell that you're deaming.
3. Asking questions- Asking yourself questions like, "Where am I?" (if your surroundings aren't everyday fimiliar ones, you'll know that you're dreaming), and the list goes on. The questions will make you come to the realisation that you're in fact dreaming.
Sadly, I know more theory than I do practical, but hopefully that will all change. This takes patience, motivation and practice. This journey might indeed transpire into something far bigger and enlightening. I'm a stickler for believing that dreams have meanings, meanings that could indeed benefit me as a person. I'll continue with dream journaling etc and update you later.
Lucid dreaming- Being in a state where you are dreaming and are fully aware that you are.
So, basically, knowing that you're dreaming. Depending on the level of lucidity you're in, you will be capable of having full control of what goes on in your dream. I'm not going to go into the all the levels of lucidity at present, but I'll probably touch on them at a later stage. For now, I'm going to talk about the journey I'm going to take to become a lucid dreamer.
NOTE: In the challenge that I'm currently taking, I do not desire to have OOBE (out of body experiences) or anything of an occult nature. Rather I simply wish to experience the extraordinary capability of lucid dreaming, and the personal enlightenment from interpreting my dreams and becoming aware of my dream signs through doing so.
Okay, now that that's out of the way, let's begin. One of the key things that is recommended to anyone who wishes to lucid dream, is a dream journal. Basically it's a diary that you keep near your bed at all times. That way, having woken up from a lucid dream/dream, you can quickly jot them down before you forget them. I now have a dream journal that stays beneath my pillow and I've been trying to record my dreams in it for about three days.
Many people don't remember their dreams and find it hard to record them (me included),that is because our brains have gotten so used to forgeting, that they're stuck in their ways. To have a stronger dream recall (term used to express remembering your dreams), you must train your mind to remember. Creating the intent in your mind to consciously remember your dreams. To do so, you can think very hard about recalling your dreams, wanting to become lucid and doing reality checks. It's all about intent.
You'll have noticed that I said "reality checks" there. What are they? Well, it's basically a check you do to ensure you that you are/are not dreaming. To become lucid you need to practice these reality checks even through the day so that your mind is so used to checking, that it will do it in it's sleep. Below are a few common reality checks:
1. Observing your hand- often in the dream world, your hand will not look like an ordinary hand. It could be discoloured, deformed etc. From seeing that your hand doesn't look normal, you'll realise that you're in a dream.
2. Holding your nose and closing your mouth- This is a test to see if you can breathe without the aid of a nose or mouth. In the dream world, you can usually breathe without them, thus you'll be able to tell that you're deaming.
3. Asking questions- Asking yourself questions like, "Where am I?" (if your surroundings aren't everyday fimiliar ones, you'll know that you're dreaming), and the list goes on. The questions will make you come to the realisation that you're in fact dreaming.
Sadly, I know more theory than I do practical, but hopefully that will all change. This takes patience, motivation and practice. This journey might indeed transpire into something far bigger and enlightening. I'm a stickler for believing that dreams have meanings, meanings that could indeed benefit me as a person. I'll continue with dream journaling etc and update you later.
Saturday 12 December 2009
What is the Meaning of Life?
Wow, big question, huh? I've decided that this question has been one of the most enlightening to answer, and I hope I can translate it into this very blog post. We as humans wish to know so much about what we cannot comprehend, and this often makes people afraid or worried about it. But from answering this question, it's like a light has just turned on in my head.
So, what is the meaning of life? Why live on this Earth? To me, the answer is different for every individual alive, so therefore I can only give you my personal answer, of which is divided into several parts. The primary meaning though, I believe, is to experience. Experiencing something new is a valuable moment in our lives. When you complete an action, it is only ever significant the very moment you do it, therefore you should savour a new experience. For example, smelling a new scent, feeling a new emotion, skydiving, spiritual awakenings, religious journeys etc. I believe that your life is in your hands. It's your responsibility to live it the way you choose. Whether that's simply completing a personal challenge like skydiving, or choosing a religious or spiritual path to go down.
The meaning of life is to trust in what you believe is right, do what you want to do, love who you want to love, go where you want to go, see what you want to see, discover what you want to discover. Believe in whatever you think is the truth.
Also included is what I like to call, "The Ups and Downs of Life". Life is about experiencing all the advantages and disadvantages of being a human, that will eventually better you as a person. "The Ups and Downs of Life" strengthen you and enable you to be ready for the next thing that tries to knock you off your feet.
To discover yourself is another aspect, but I'll touch on that matter at a later stage. For now, this is a short answer of what I believe is the meaning of life.
So, what is the meaning of life? Why live on this Earth? To me, the answer is different for every individual alive, so therefore I can only give you my personal answer, of which is divided into several parts. The primary meaning though, I believe, is to experience. Experiencing something new is a valuable moment in our lives. When you complete an action, it is only ever significant the very moment you do it, therefore you should savour a new experience. For example, smelling a new scent, feeling a new emotion, skydiving, spiritual awakenings, religious journeys etc. I believe that your life is in your hands. It's your responsibility to live it the way you choose. Whether that's simply completing a personal challenge like skydiving, or choosing a religious or spiritual path to go down.
The meaning of life is to trust in what you believe is right, do what you want to do, love who you want to love, go where you want to go, see what you want to see, discover what you want to discover. Believe in whatever you think is the truth.
Also included is what I like to call, "The Ups and Downs of Life". Life is about experiencing all the advantages and disadvantages of being a human, that will eventually better you as a person. "The Ups and Downs of Life" strengthen you and enable you to be ready for the next thing that tries to knock you off your feet.
To discover yourself is another aspect, but I'll touch on that matter at a later stage. For now, this is a short answer of what I believe is the meaning of life.
Tuesday 8 December 2009
Looking for Questions
Over the duration of about let's say, two weeks, I've been searching for philosophical questions to answer. The process has been very rewarding as I've cleared my mind of some questions that were personal and relevent to me as a person. It just feels so satisfying when you've go it all figured out.
Anyways, most of you will know I have a YouTube account under the name, 'fellowtuber123'. Recently I posted a video in which I comtemplated Death and Religion. Below is a the URL of the video.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZvdrLMI-z1U
Anyways, most of you will know I have a YouTube account under the name, 'fellowtuber123'. Recently I posted a video in which I comtemplated Death and Religion. Below is a the URL of the video.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZvdrLMI-z1U
Saturday 28 November 2009
For You, Dear Reader
Together we will swim in the depths of each other's thoughts as two people, but arise to the surface as one.
It Just Doesn't Feel Like Christmas Anymore
This coming Tuesday, it will be the 1st of December, the countdown to the big day. There's something about this year unlike any other year...It doesn't feel like Christmas. I feel as if I've grown up in a flash and I'm not getting swept up in the hype of Christmas. It seems that when you hit your teens, toys don't seem to satisfy you anymore. You want bigger things, less afordable things. MP3 Player's, laptops, game consoles and the list goes on. But I don't really need or want these things. Unlike any other teenager I know, I want poetry books and an SD 4mb camcorder card and so on...
Another thing that's getting me really peeved off is how towns and cities have already turned on their Christmas tree lights! It was bloomin' November! It's just ridiculous! In late October, supermarkets had all their Christmas stock in stores, television is all filled with toy adverts and shopping centers saying, "Come buy all your Christmas presents here!" It's getting very frustrating.
Christmas just seems an excuse to waste money, go clubbing, get drunk and put on weight. And then supermarkets get their Easter stock in and I just walk on and sigh.
Another thing that's getting me really peeved off is how towns and cities have already turned on their Christmas tree lights! It was bloomin' November! It's just ridiculous! In late October, supermarkets had all their Christmas stock in stores, television is all filled with toy adverts and shopping centers saying, "Come buy all your Christmas presents here!" It's getting very frustrating.
Christmas just seems an excuse to waste money, go clubbing, get drunk and put on weight. And then supermarkets get their Easter stock in and I just walk on and sigh.
Thursday 26 November 2009
50 Book Challenge Fail
Quite some time ago, I mentioned that I was going to try and complete the 50 Book Challenge, and boy did I fail. There are a number of reasons for this, one being that I haven't got my own money to buy a lot of books. If I go to the library and get some, I have to finish them in a period of about two weeks or so. That doesn't really fit in with my schedule so therefore it's useless. But I think once December passes, I'm going to re-start the challenge and try get some reading done.
I year's not up yet since I began, but there's no way I could catch up now, I'm way too far behind. Though I'm determined to complete it in 2010.
CURRENTLY READING:
"Northern Lights" by Phillip Pullman
and
"Studying Poetry" though I can't remember the author.
I year's not up yet since I began, but there's no way I could catch up now, I'm way too far behind. Though I'm determined to complete it in 2010.
CURRENTLY READING:
"Northern Lights" by Phillip Pullman
and
"Studying Poetry" though I can't remember the author.
An Excerpt of Yet Another Short Story
Disturbing? Maybe. Make of it what you will.
The impact of the water stung like a whip on my cold flesh. I was completely submerged in the murky lake, and already I could faintly hear the screams of passers-by who had witnessed what I’d done. I did not try to swim to the surface…I did not want to. My body froze and the iciness of the water made my joints stiff and painful to move. I could feel myself descending to the bed of the lake, ever so slowly. My lungs tightened, my ears popped and my head was throbbing. I could feel myself drifting away from this life, until…
My eyes burst open. A man in his early thirties was hunched over me as I lay coughing up the fowl water on the ground. He was dripping wet, yelling muffled words at me. I struggled to breathe and my vision turned on and off like a light bulb. From what I could see during the strange intervals, a crowd of people swarmed around me, all chattering to each other about the incident. Two or three men pushed them back, obviously trying to give me some space. I felt like I’d been punched in the chest consecutively for a life time. Later, the doctors told me that was because the high pressure of the water pushing down on me while I was drowning.
I stayed in hospital for three days until I recovered. My mother cried for hours every time she looked at me in the hospital bed. I hated to hear her cry, the one person who dried my tears and put on a brave face every morning, was crying. She cried, because this was my third attempt to commit suicide in two months…
TO BE CONTINUED...
The impact of the water stung like a whip on my cold flesh. I was completely submerged in the murky lake, and already I could faintly hear the screams of passers-by who had witnessed what I’d done. I did not try to swim to the surface…I did not want to. My body froze and the iciness of the water made my joints stiff and painful to move. I could feel myself descending to the bed of the lake, ever so slowly. My lungs tightened, my ears popped and my head was throbbing. I could feel myself drifting away from this life, until…
My eyes burst open. A man in his early thirties was hunched over me as I lay coughing up the fowl water on the ground. He was dripping wet, yelling muffled words at me. I struggled to breathe and my vision turned on and off like a light bulb. From what I could see during the strange intervals, a crowd of people swarmed around me, all chattering to each other about the incident. Two or three men pushed them back, obviously trying to give me some space. I felt like I’d been punched in the chest consecutively for a life time. Later, the doctors told me that was because the high pressure of the water pushing down on me while I was drowning.
I stayed in hospital for three days until I recovered. My mother cried for hours every time she looked at me in the hospital bed. I hated to hear her cry, the one person who dried my tears and put on a brave face every morning, was crying. She cried, because this was my third attempt to commit suicide in two months…
TO BE CONTINUED...
Sunday 22 November 2009
An Unfinished Work of Fiction
The messenger stormed through the corridors, his dark cloak gliding behind him. The sound of his footsteps echoed off the stone walls. After walking for what seemed like an eternity through the narrow tunnels of Salfalk Castle, he finally stopped at a door. It was robust and was made of mahogany. There was a door knocker in the form of an angry gargoyle, it’s mouth wide open, fangs glaring at the messenger. He took hold of it and gave three hard knocks.
There was no reply for several seconds until an elderly voice beckoned the visitor inside. The messenger opened the heavy door, closed it once inside, and approached an old man seated at a desk.
His face was weak and pale, broken up it seemed, by define wrinkles. He slouched in his large chair and his hands were clasped on top of numerous papers. The only thing that made him look young, were his eyes. They were lively amber in colour, glistening in the glow of the fire. You couldn’t help but see kindness within them, as they were so warm and friendly. He too was dressed in a cloak, but a red one, only given to the Diatecs, the wisest in all of Salfalk Castle. Messengers and other low classed inhabitants wore black ones.
“Excuse me Master Vankar, sir.”
“What is it?”
“Master Brulle would like you to join him for lunch this afternoon.”
“Would he now?” Master Vankar smiled.
“Tell him that’s fine. I shall meet him in the lounge at noon.” he continued.He glanced up at the clock; eleven-fifteen.
The messenger bowed, turned, and left the study. Master Vankar stood up and went over to a wooden cabinet with glass panels. Inside on several shelves sat glasses and a bottle of whiskey. He carefully poured some into a glass and stood staring at the flames of the fire dance. All around him were bookshelves built into the walls. The books themselves were old, probably as old as the castle. They were a mixture of dull greens, browns and blacks, and Master Vankar had read them all, some more than once.
His job was to educate the young students who enrolled to Salfalk Castle, where they would learn many things including Maths, English, Science, Latin and the art of Magic. So, naturally he studied day and night, filling up his head with everything he could find. Never drawing the line of how much knowledge he could obtain. He was not the only one who taught the students, all the Diatecs did. But Master Vankar was highly respected by everyone in the castle for his wisdom and kindness. Master Brulle was the founder of Salfalk Castle, and was very old indeed. In fact, many reckoned that he should be dead by now, but the power of the magic which he'd obtained over the years gave him the strength to live another day.
Master Vankar was good friends with Brulle, and had been since they were both students. They grew up together and encountered many things in their day. Sometimes they would gather and talk about old times, laughing all the while. But not all the stories were joyful…
Occasionally Vankar took over for Master Brulle when he was feeling ill, and if anything went wrong during the times he did take over, it would be up to him to clean up the mess.
There was no reply for several seconds until an elderly voice beckoned the visitor inside. The messenger opened the heavy door, closed it once inside, and approached an old man seated at a desk.
His face was weak and pale, broken up it seemed, by define wrinkles. He slouched in his large chair and his hands were clasped on top of numerous papers. The only thing that made him look young, were his eyes. They were lively amber in colour, glistening in the glow of the fire. You couldn’t help but see kindness within them, as they were so warm and friendly. He too was dressed in a cloak, but a red one, only given to the Diatecs, the wisest in all of Salfalk Castle. Messengers and other low classed inhabitants wore black ones.
“Excuse me Master Vankar, sir.”
“What is it?”
“Master Brulle would like you to join him for lunch this afternoon.”
“Would he now?” Master Vankar smiled.
“Tell him that’s fine. I shall meet him in the lounge at noon.” he continued.He glanced up at the clock; eleven-fifteen.
The messenger bowed, turned, and left the study. Master Vankar stood up and went over to a wooden cabinet with glass panels. Inside on several shelves sat glasses and a bottle of whiskey. He carefully poured some into a glass and stood staring at the flames of the fire dance. All around him were bookshelves built into the walls. The books themselves were old, probably as old as the castle. They were a mixture of dull greens, browns and blacks, and Master Vankar had read them all, some more than once.
His job was to educate the young students who enrolled to Salfalk Castle, where they would learn many things including Maths, English, Science, Latin and the art of Magic. So, naturally he studied day and night, filling up his head with everything he could find. Never drawing the line of how much knowledge he could obtain. He was not the only one who taught the students, all the Diatecs did. But Master Vankar was highly respected by everyone in the castle for his wisdom and kindness. Master Brulle was the founder of Salfalk Castle, and was very old indeed. In fact, many reckoned that he should be dead by now, but the power of the magic which he'd obtained over the years gave him the strength to live another day.
Master Vankar was good friends with Brulle, and had been since they were both students. They grew up together and encountered many things in their day. Sometimes they would gather and talk about old times, laughing all the while. But not all the stories were joyful…
Occasionally Vankar took over for Master Brulle when he was feeling ill, and if anything went wrong during the times he did take over, it would be up to him to clean up the mess.
If you could meet any person; Who Would it Be?
You've already seen the title, my friend, so give me an answer. ;-)
Friday 20 November 2009
Time to Read- "Northern Lights"
Over these past few weeks I've found it harder and harder to fit in some time to sit down with a book, and read. I've had so many things to do. Homework, family, friends and time to myself. You're probably thinking, "Why don't you just read when you're having "time to yourself". " Good point. I usually spend this "time to myself" sitting on my computer watching YT videos and just couldn't be bothered reading a book as entertainment.
I have so many books that I want to read but never have the time or make the effort to do so. One book that I'm trying to read and am throughly enjoying is, "Northern Lights" by Phillip Pullman. It's a 397 page book that is the first of a three book series called, "His Dark Materials". The other two books I believe are called, "The Subtle Knife" and "The Amber Spyglass". In "Northern Lights" an instrument is featured which plays a major part in the plot. It's called the alethiometer. In the book, alethio means truth, and meter means measure, so it's the truth measure. If you've ever seen the motion picture, "The Golden Compass", you'll know what this instrument looks like. If not, then you should look it up on Google images, it's quite a cool looking gadget. It resembles a compass or a pocket watch, and it has three dials with many, many ivory carved pictures around the rim inside the compass face. Each picture means different things, and in turn those things mean different things. For example, there is one picture with an hour glass and a skull above it. This means time and death.
The idea is that, in your mind you think of a question that you want to know the answer to. You then pick three symbols/pictures that relate to what you want to know, then think about your question and the dials move to different symbols in order to give you an answer. By looking at the symbols, you have to interpret their meaning to get the answer. Of course, it's not real or anything, but you can buy one of these things. I've seen numerous videos on You Tube of people showing off their cool alethiometer. Anyways, I just thought it was an interesting concept. Reading Pullman's book here has been amazing. His plotting is extraordinary! Just when you think you know the plot like the back of your hand...BANG! There's twist in the tale and the tension reaches a new peak. I'd definately recommened this book, even to those who are older than teenagers. It's a book not to miss!
Anyways, it seems I strayed from the subject matter there. I haven't had the time to read this fantastic novel. So far, I'm on page 147. It's been a fantastic roller coaster ride of a read. Thankfully though, I had about an hour and a half worth of time to get some reading done, and I did just that!
Another thing I'd like to mention regarding something featured in the book. I find it fascinating! The concept of "daemons" (pronounced "de-mons"). In the book, every human being has a daemon, which is basically their spirit or soul in the form of an animal. It is very close to it's human owner and daemons express the human's feeling via body language. If your sex is female, your daemon will be male, and if your sex is male, your daemon will be female. When you're a child your daemon is capable of shape-shifting into different animals, e.g from a moth to a cat etc. But when you reach adolescence, you daemon is not capable of changing shape anymore, it remains one animal. Some people's are crows, cats, lemurs, squirrels, butterflies etc. And if one daemon fights/hurt another daemon, the human owner will feel the pain too. Isn't that interesting.
Well, maybe not for you, but I guess you have to read the book to understand what I mean. I'm sorry if I went on a bit too much, but it's just a really good book. Very well plotted.
I have so many books that I want to read but never have the time or make the effort to do so. One book that I'm trying to read and am throughly enjoying is, "Northern Lights" by Phillip Pullman. It's a 397 page book that is the first of a three book series called, "His Dark Materials". The other two books I believe are called, "The Subtle Knife" and "The Amber Spyglass". In "Northern Lights" an instrument is featured which plays a major part in the plot. It's called the alethiometer. In the book, alethio means truth, and meter means measure, so it's the truth measure. If you've ever seen the motion picture, "The Golden Compass", you'll know what this instrument looks like. If not, then you should look it up on Google images, it's quite a cool looking gadget. It resembles a compass or a pocket watch, and it has three dials with many, many ivory carved pictures around the rim inside the compass face. Each picture means different things, and in turn those things mean different things. For example, there is one picture with an hour glass and a skull above it. This means time and death.
The idea is that, in your mind you think of a question that you want to know the answer to. You then pick three symbols/pictures that relate to what you want to know, then think about your question and the dials move to different symbols in order to give you an answer. By looking at the symbols, you have to interpret their meaning to get the answer. Of course, it's not real or anything, but you can buy one of these things. I've seen numerous videos on You Tube of people showing off their cool alethiometer. Anyways, I just thought it was an interesting concept. Reading Pullman's book here has been amazing. His plotting is extraordinary! Just when you think you know the plot like the back of your hand...BANG! There's twist in the tale and the tension reaches a new peak. I'd definately recommened this book, even to those who are older than teenagers. It's a book not to miss!
Anyways, it seems I strayed from the subject matter there. I haven't had the time to read this fantastic novel. So far, I'm on page 147. It's been a fantastic roller coaster ride of a read. Thankfully though, I had about an hour and a half worth of time to get some reading done, and I did just that!
Another thing I'd like to mention regarding something featured in the book. I find it fascinating! The concept of "daemons" (pronounced "de-mons"). In the book, every human being has a daemon, which is basically their spirit or soul in the form of an animal. It is very close to it's human owner and daemons express the human's feeling via body language. If your sex is female, your daemon will be male, and if your sex is male, your daemon will be female. When you're a child your daemon is capable of shape-shifting into different animals, e.g from a moth to a cat etc. But when you reach adolescence, you daemon is not capable of changing shape anymore, it remains one animal. Some people's are crows, cats, lemurs, squirrels, butterflies etc. And if one daemon fights/hurt another daemon, the human owner will feel the pain too. Isn't that interesting.
Well, maybe not for you, but I guess you have to read the book to understand what I mean. I'm sorry if I went on a bit too much, but it's just a really good book. Very well plotted.
Thursday 19 November 2009
I Hate Mathematics
I said it. I hate the thing that you need, to get anywhere in this world. It seems that in almost every job on the planet, you'll need to know your maths. I for one, have never been good at maths. Never. I have absolutely no mental maths capacity in my brain. I can't really solve maths problems either, and the only thing that I'm good at in maths is alegbra and formulas. I can count money and I know my times tables etc. But overall I suck at this subject. Let's look at what could be the cause of this.
1. Genes
2. I'm just naturally not good
3. I don't bother trying hard to become good
4. I'm more creative than logical
Let me explain number one. My Mum was never any good at maths either. She didn't really get good marks in her maths exams, but she was far better at English, as am I. Now, I don't know if this has anything to do with genes or something that I've inherited, but it seems like a valid explanation to me. My Dad was pretty good at maths though, and I've inherited a lot of things from him, just not his ability in this particular subject.
Number two...Well I've often just thought, "That's it! I can't do this, I just naturally suck at maths and I always will!" And I'll tell you, I've said that alot! I think you can not have the ability to do something. Just like you can have the ability to naturally pick things up. I didn't grow to love English, I just always have. From the teachers comments over the years about my work, it seems I'm pretty good at it too. So, likewise, I can just as easily not be good at maths.
Number three, well this could indeed be the cause, but I think I've proved it to be wrong. Over the years I've tried so hard to do well, and I still am below the average and find it hard. A good mark to me, is when I've improved from my last mark. Two years ago, I got 40% in a maths exam, bad right? Then the following year I tried harder to do better and I got 67%. Bingo, improvement. I don't care how bad it may have seemed to other people, because at least I knew that I'd improved and made progress. My teacher was even happy for me. 67% was enough to get me into the top class though. I guess you could say that if you try hard at anyting in life, you'll get somewhere. It might be harder because you don't particualrly like the subject, but you can still suceed.
Number four is my best theory. The left side of the brain is more logical whereas the right side is more creative. It's obvious that my right side is stronger. Below are some pieces of information that were copied from the internet:
Left Brain
Logical
Sequential
Rational
Analytical
Objective
Looks at parts
Right side
Random
Intuitive
Holistic
Synthesizing
Subjective
Looks at wholes
How is the Right Brain / Left Brain Concept Relevant to Artists?
"When you start a painting, you need be able to to visualise the final painting in your mind (right brain, working from the whole), then develop the painting, chosing the elements, matching and mixing colours, placing in the shadows and highlights (right brain, working on various things simultaneously), but at the same time be able to look critically at what you've doing (left brain, being analytical). By finding out whether your thinking is dominated by your right or left brain, you can then deliberately set out to use the 'right brain' way of thinking in your painting or drawing, rather than working on 'auto-pilot'. By trying a different strategy you will probably be surprised by what different results you can produce."
Well, personally, I like the way I think. Being creative suits me fine. I'm not saying that being good at Maths is a bad thing, it's great!
*Yawn* I'm tired...
1. Genes
2. I'm just naturally not good
3. I don't bother trying hard to become good
4. I'm more creative than logical
Let me explain number one. My Mum was never any good at maths either. She didn't really get good marks in her maths exams, but she was far better at English, as am I. Now, I don't know if this has anything to do with genes or something that I've inherited, but it seems like a valid explanation to me. My Dad was pretty good at maths though, and I've inherited a lot of things from him, just not his ability in this particular subject.
Number two...Well I've often just thought, "That's it! I can't do this, I just naturally suck at maths and I always will!" And I'll tell you, I've said that alot! I think you can not have the ability to do something. Just like you can have the ability to naturally pick things up. I didn't grow to love English, I just always have. From the teachers comments over the years about my work, it seems I'm pretty good at it too. So, likewise, I can just as easily not be good at maths.
Number three, well this could indeed be the cause, but I think I've proved it to be wrong. Over the years I've tried so hard to do well, and I still am below the average and find it hard. A good mark to me, is when I've improved from my last mark. Two years ago, I got 40% in a maths exam, bad right? Then the following year I tried harder to do better and I got 67%. Bingo, improvement. I don't care how bad it may have seemed to other people, because at least I knew that I'd improved and made progress. My teacher was even happy for me. 67% was enough to get me into the top class though. I guess you could say that if you try hard at anyting in life, you'll get somewhere. It might be harder because you don't particualrly like the subject, but you can still suceed.
Number four is my best theory. The left side of the brain is more logical whereas the right side is more creative. It's obvious that my right side is stronger. Below are some pieces of information that were copied from the internet:
Left Brain
Logical
Sequential
Rational
Analytical
Objective
Looks at parts
Right side
Random
Intuitive
Holistic
Synthesizing
Subjective
Looks at wholes
How is the Right Brain / Left Brain Concept Relevant to Artists?
"When you start a painting, you need be able to to visualise the final painting in your mind (right brain, working from the whole), then develop the painting, chosing the elements, matching and mixing colours, placing in the shadows and highlights (right brain, working on various things simultaneously), but at the same time be able to look critically at what you've doing (left brain, being analytical). By finding out whether your thinking is dominated by your right or left brain, you can then deliberately set out to use the 'right brain' way of thinking in your painting or drawing, rather than working on 'auto-pilot'. By trying a different strategy you will probably be surprised by what different results you can produce."
Well, personally, I like the way I think. Being creative suits me fine. I'm not saying that being good at Maths is a bad thing, it's great!
*Yawn* I'm tired...
I'm Not Addicted to Coffee
Maybe I'm experiencing self-denial or something, but I'll definately argue that I am not addicted to coffee. "What?! I thirteen year old girl drinking coffee?!" Whatever. I tried it and I liked it, so I drink it. I know, coffee stuns your growth, it stains your teeth. I've realized adults who are tea and coffee drinkers tell me those effects occasionally. Hypocrites! They're the ones who drink around three cups a day and I'm lucky if I have one! Maybe they're doing it to protect me or warn me, "You don't want to end up like us.", while sitting nice and cosy with a mug in their hands.
To be honest, I shouldn't really be drinking coffee. I have braces and if the coffee stains my teeth I'll be in big trouble. I was specifically warned by the dentist, "No hard or sticky sweets, stay away from breads like bagettes, no fizzy drinks or coffee, don't eat corn on the cob..." and the list goes on, but hey, old habits die hard. At least I don't drink fizzy drinks, or crusty bread or corn on the cob. But I like a mug of coffee and the odd bar of chocolate every once in a while...
Caffiene, the big ingredient that coffee drinkers get addicted to, and tea drinkers I suppose. They say that addicts have to have a few cups or they'll be tired or stressed, and maybe that's an excuse to hide the fact that they really are addicted to it. For me, I just like the taste and the smell. Notice the word, like, not love. And when I go deeper into the matter of drugs and such, I start thinking about why they were made, included as ingredients in food and drink and why they were sold to the public. If things like cigarettes and alcohol are so bad, why were they produced? Money would probably be they answer to that question. It just goes to show you that humanity is willing to sell unhealthy drugs to people that can effectly lead to their death, for money and profit. Not that caffiene is going to kill you, but a lot of other drugs obviously can.
So, just because I like the odd drink of coffee does not mean I think I need it to live. Besides, if I was addicted to coffee, what's the problem, surely it would be my own fault? So therefore, you shouldn't care.
To be honest, I shouldn't really be drinking coffee. I have braces and if the coffee stains my teeth I'll be in big trouble. I was specifically warned by the dentist, "No hard or sticky sweets, stay away from breads like bagettes, no fizzy drinks or coffee, don't eat corn on the cob..." and the list goes on, but hey, old habits die hard. At least I don't drink fizzy drinks, or crusty bread or corn on the cob. But I like a mug of coffee and the odd bar of chocolate every once in a while...
Caffiene, the big ingredient that coffee drinkers get addicted to, and tea drinkers I suppose. They say that addicts have to have a few cups or they'll be tired or stressed, and maybe that's an excuse to hide the fact that they really are addicted to it. For me, I just like the taste and the smell. Notice the word, like, not love. And when I go deeper into the matter of drugs and such, I start thinking about why they were made, included as ingredients in food and drink and why they were sold to the public. If things like cigarettes and alcohol are so bad, why were they produced? Money would probably be they answer to that question. It just goes to show you that humanity is willing to sell unhealthy drugs to people that can effectly lead to their death, for money and profit. Not that caffiene is going to kill you, but a lot of other drugs obviously can.
So, just because I like the odd drink of coffee does not mean I think I need it to live. Besides, if I was addicted to coffee, what's the problem, surely it would be my own fault? So therefore, you shouldn't care.
Tuesday 17 November 2009
My Life is Collapsing
Sometimes through day-to-day life I feel like everything's buzzing around me too fast that I can't really understand how things got that way. Parts of my life collapse and just float away from me, and it seems that I have no comtrol of their flight. I get so frustrated and angry with myself for getting into a mess that no one could control.
Half the time, I'm not even sure if they could be avoided. I have a tendency to get lost in my self and my thinking and then awake suddenly in a dilema who's source I can't trace. This then leads to me feeling guilty and ashamed for not making an effort in some situation and I feel like isolating myself from the world. I've been doing that a lot lately.
Self-seclusion is something I'm very good at. Very few people have the same mind set as myself, and my interests often differ from my peers. Thus, I cut myself off from the world and be in the company of someone who does share my hobbies, myself. It's horrible to admit, but it's true, and there would be no point starting this blog if I was to post lies over and over again.
I'm constantly being poked and prodded at my life's cruel finger and it's starting to get bloody annoying.
Half the time, I'm not even sure if they could be avoided. I have a tendency to get lost in my self and my thinking and then awake suddenly in a dilema who's source I can't trace. This then leads to me feeling guilty and ashamed for not making an effort in some situation and I feel like isolating myself from the world. I've been doing that a lot lately.
Self-seclusion is something I'm very good at. Very few people have the same mind set as myself, and my interests often differ from my peers. Thus, I cut myself off from the world and be in the company of someone who does share my hobbies, myself. It's horrible to admit, but it's true, and there would be no point starting this blog if I was to post lies over and over again.
I'm constantly being poked and prodded at my life's cruel finger and it's starting to get bloody annoying.
Monday 16 November 2009
Following the Crowd
I am here to discuss my outrage at the concept of ‘following the crowd’. One cannot condense into words how it frustrates me to see young people change themselves to please others. “Others”, who usually have no interest in what you do, they only want to see you trying to impress them; it gives them a sense of power.
In some cases, young people try to change themselves to look like someone in a magazine. For example, many young teenage girls look at models in fashion magazines and try to lose drastic amounts of weight to look just like those skeletons in the media. In some cases, they make themselves vomit and eat little or no food. Likewise, young teenage boys see men with rock hard abs and bulging biceps and do all that they can to mimic these men’s appearance. Not only can these things be harmful for your body, they can be harmful to your mind. If you’re constantly trying to be someone else, you’ll never find out who you really are. Going to these drastic measures can lower your self-esteem and you tend to become more self-conscious about what people think of you.
I’d also like to point out something that’s rather important. Don’t you realize that these men and women have had a whole team of make-up artists working on their appearance for hours? Don’t you realize that their picture has been photo-shopped look how the editor wants them to? Don’t you realize that they’ve been spray tanned and pampered? Therefore, they are not truly the people you see plastered in magazines.
You see, companies want to sell as much of their products as possible, they want to make big profits from you. By looking at this “perfect” model showcasing their beautiful skin thanks to this special cream, people are warped into thinking that they should buy this product so they get the same results. Not only can those products be harmful to your body, you’re being suckered in and you’re effectively wasting your money. I believe we can’t slow down the process of ageing, it’s got to happen, and forever rubbing cream and products on your skin is not going to make a difference.
We’ve got to accept who we are, and that might seem difficult at first when you’ve been brainwashed beforehand, but it’s the right way to go. Of course you’ve got to make some effort to keep yourself smart looking, but going overboard with it will only cause a whole lot of trouble. Don’t be like everyone else. You are who you are, and beneath all the cosmetics lies an extraordinary human being. Let that person show.
In some cases, young people try to change themselves to look like someone in a magazine. For example, many young teenage girls look at models in fashion magazines and try to lose drastic amounts of weight to look just like those skeletons in the media. In some cases, they make themselves vomit and eat little or no food. Likewise, young teenage boys see men with rock hard abs and bulging biceps and do all that they can to mimic these men’s appearance. Not only can these things be harmful for your body, they can be harmful to your mind. If you’re constantly trying to be someone else, you’ll never find out who you really are. Going to these drastic measures can lower your self-esteem and you tend to become more self-conscious about what people think of you.
I’d also like to point out something that’s rather important. Don’t you realize that these men and women have had a whole team of make-up artists working on their appearance for hours? Don’t you realize that their picture has been photo-shopped look how the editor wants them to? Don’t you realize that they’ve been spray tanned and pampered? Therefore, they are not truly the people you see plastered in magazines.
You see, companies want to sell as much of their products as possible, they want to make big profits from you. By looking at this “perfect” model showcasing their beautiful skin thanks to this special cream, people are warped into thinking that they should buy this product so they get the same results. Not only can those products be harmful to your body, you’re being suckered in and you’re effectively wasting your money. I believe we can’t slow down the process of ageing, it’s got to happen, and forever rubbing cream and products on your skin is not going to make a difference.
We’ve got to accept who we are, and that might seem difficult at first when you’ve been brainwashed beforehand, but it’s the right way to go. Of course you’ve got to make some effort to keep yourself smart looking, but going overboard with it will only cause a whole lot of trouble. Don’t be like everyone else. You are who you are, and beneath all the cosmetics lies an extraordinary human being. Let that person show.
Saturday 14 November 2009
We Are Terminated (poem)
The following is a poem I wrote a few days ago. I changed and added some things to the first draft and this is the finished product.
The one I used to be has been terminated,
I have been programmed to see with democratic eyes.
My warm veins have morphed into cold circuitry,
With brain-washed charges surging through them.
I do not walk the same; talk the same, or act with original nature,
My cup is void of emotion, it evaporated as I grew colder.
I no longer have possession of my own mind,
For they manipulate my thoughts for their gain.
I understand they monitor us through lenses of technology,
We could not rebel against them; or were we afraid to?
We all were blinded when the sun was down,
We had our chance to see what was to come.
I cannot remember having dominance of my inner being,
And I yearn to gain control of it with each passing day.
No individual thoughts elude from my mind when I try,
Caged within the confines of the box they built here.
What can I do? I have departed, I have abandoned you,
I was destroyed by those who were terminated long before.
The one I used to be has been terminated,
I have been programmed to see with democratic eyes.
My warm veins have morphed into cold circuitry,
With brain-washed charges surging through them.
I do not walk the same; talk the same, or act with original nature,
My cup is void of emotion, it evaporated as I grew colder.
I no longer have possession of my own mind,
For they manipulate my thoughts for their gain.
I understand they monitor us through lenses of technology,
We could not rebel against them; or were we afraid to?
We all were blinded when the sun was down,
We had our chance to see what was to come.
I cannot remember having dominance of my inner being,
And I yearn to gain control of it with each passing day.
No individual thoughts elude from my mind when I try,
Caged within the confines of the box they built here.
What can I do? I have departed, I have abandoned you,
I was destroyed by those who were terminated long before.
Saturday 7 November 2009
The Early Bird Gets The Worm
The expression above may seem kind've gross, but there's a very good moral behind it:
When you get a head start to the day, you'll get that worm, that prize, that thing you've wanted to get done since last week. ;-)
I've come to realise something, during the weekdays, I hate waking up with a passion, and am usually tired. But on the weekends, I love getting up early and having some time to myself, or write poetry or just sit thinking about things. Then, when Monday morning crawls over I am exhausted and question whether I even bother to get up early on the weekends.
But, that fact aside I enjoy mornings, and I'm always in a good mood. I just love that feeling that you can accomplish something today. No matter how small or big. In fact even accomplishing nothing could pass as an accomplishment. There isn't a more satisfying feeling...Well...except sleeping. ;-)
When you get a head start to the day, you'll get that worm, that prize, that thing you've wanted to get done since last week. ;-)
I've come to realise something, during the weekdays, I hate waking up with a passion, and am usually tired. But on the weekends, I love getting up early and having some time to myself, or write poetry or just sit thinking about things. Then, when Monday morning crawls over I am exhausted and question whether I even bother to get up early on the weekends.
But, that fact aside I enjoy mornings, and I'm always in a good mood. I just love that feeling that you can accomplish something today. No matter how small or big. In fact even accomplishing nothing could pass as an accomplishment. There isn't a more satisfying feeling...Well...except sleeping. ;-)
Friday 6 November 2009
Analyzing Poetry
Currently in English class, we’ve been studying poetry. To be precise, war poetry. To be even more precise, war poetry by Wilfred Owen. Wilfred Owen was a poet who fought in World War 1 and described so vividly what he encountered. In class, we’ve had to analyze many of his poems. A number of his poems have touched me and changed my outlook on war and also have made me have more respect for the men and women that fight/fought in wars for us.
I went slightly off topic there, but nevertheless, I wanted to blog about analyzing poetry. I’m going to give you some humble tips on how I, myself, analyze poetry. This might be the way you do it too, and then again, it might not, but let’s give it a go anyway.
THE DRAFT
1. When I’m given a poem to analyze, firstly, I just read it through normally. I do not look out for anything in particular, I just read.
2. Next, I’ll read the poem aloud several times. I often find that it can make more sense by doing this, and I’ll notice things like alliteration, style, rhyme and rhythm.
3. Thirdly, I grab a highlighter or pen, and underline certain words or phrases that stand out to me. I take my time and pace myself through the poem, really looking out for things that catch my eye.
4. Then, from these highlighted/underlined phrases, I write a brief, short sentence about what the text is saying and/or meaning. At the side of the page, I might also include some little points about who the writer is addressing, the writer’s style, tone etc.
NEAT COPY
1. Now, from the rough points you’ve written, begin to expand these on a new piece of paper, making them more detailed and organised. To make it clearer, include what stanza or line you’re talking about and use quotes to back-up your points.
2. Be sure to include the actual terms for different things to show that you know what they are, e.g adjectives, verbs, nouns etc.
And that’s my guide to analyzing poetry. I don’t claim to know everything about analyzing poetry; these are just my humble tips. Have fun!
I went slightly off topic there, but nevertheless, I wanted to blog about analyzing poetry. I’m going to give you some humble tips on how I, myself, analyze poetry. This might be the way you do it too, and then again, it might not, but let’s give it a go anyway.
THE DRAFT
1. When I’m given a poem to analyze, firstly, I just read it through normally. I do not look out for anything in particular, I just read.
2. Next, I’ll read the poem aloud several times. I often find that it can make more sense by doing this, and I’ll notice things like alliteration, style, rhyme and rhythm.
3. Thirdly, I grab a highlighter or pen, and underline certain words or phrases that stand out to me. I take my time and pace myself through the poem, really looking out for things that catch my eye.
4. Then, from these highlighted/underlined phrases, I write a brief, short sentence about what the text is saying and/or meaning. At the side of the page, I might also include some little points about who the writer is addressing, the writer’s style, tone etc.
NEAT COPY
1. Now, from the rough points you’ve written, begin to expand these on a new piece of paper, making them more detailed and organised. To make it clearer, include what stanza or line you’re talking about and use quotes to back-up your points.
2. Be sure to include the actual terms for different things to show that you know what they are, e.g adjectives, verbs, nouns etc.
And that’s my guide to analyzing poetry. I don’t claim to know everything about analyzing poetry; these are just my humble tips. Have fun!
Accidents, do they exist?
Do you think there is such a thing as, an accident? Everything happens for a reason, we were born for reason, we'll die for a reason, we DO things for different reasons. Nothing is an accident. Even if you didn't mean for something to happen, it still did. It was destined to occur.
I guess we just call things, 'accidents', because we didn't mean for them to happen, or you didn't know that they would happen . But time is drawn out already, and because we live INSIDE of time (i.e we only experience the present), and not OUTSIDE of it (like God, who knows what is to come), we have no way of seeing the things in the future, whether they be good or bad.
I guess we just call things, 'accidents', because we didn't mean for them to happen, or you didn't know that they would happen . But time is drawn out already, and because we live INSIDE of time (i.e we only experience the present), and not OUTSIDE of it (like God, who knows what is to come), we have no way of seeing the things in the future, whether they be good or bad.
Thursday 5 November 2009
To Town And Back
In today's blog, I thought I'd post another poem about what I see when I cycle around my town. This poem is not rhymed and is rather short, but nevertheless, I hope you like what you see. Thank you. Now here it is...
To Town And Back
Spinning wheels attached to a metal frame,
The energy seeping through my thighs.
My movement steady and rhythmic in nature
And my legs feel as if they’re not present.
Four wheeled metal boxes revving on the right,
Toxic fumes spluttering from their behind.
Horns and sirens bouncing off concrete buildings,
Small talk approaches then fades away as I pass.
Fatigue gangs drunk out of their skulls on the sidewalk,
Slurring foul words, polluting the air with a poisonous cloud.
People out walking in the streets to nowhere
Wrapped up in scarves and hands buried in their pockets.
Old ladies in doorways sweeping dirt to one side,
Occasionally lifting their heads, then returning to their work.
The hub-bub of traffic, slowing down, then speeding up,
Weaving round parked cars on the kerbside.
Cold wind numbing my face, blowing my hair in all directions.
Cheeks coloured pink, hands gripped around the metal bars.
I have seen what needs to be seen, done what needs to be done,
Now to town I have went, home I shall go.
To Town And Back
Spinning wheels attached to a metal frame,
The energy seeping through my thighs.
My movement steady and rhythmic in nature
And my legs feel as if they’re not present.
Four wheeled metal boxes revving on the right,
Toxic fumes spluttering from their behind.
Horns and sirens bouncing off concrete buildings,
Small talk approaches then fades away as I pass.
Fatigue gangs drunk out of their skulls on the sidewalk,
Slurring foul words, polluting the air with a poisonous cloud.
People out walking in the streets to nowhere
Wrapped up in scarves and hands buried in their pockets.
Old ladies in doorways sweeping dirt to one side,
Occasionally lifting their heads, then returning to their work.
The hub-bub of traffic, slowing down, then speeding up,
Weaving round parked cars on the kerbside.
Cold wind numbing my face, blowing my hair in all directions.
Cheeks coloured pink, hands gripped around the metal bars.
I have seen what needs to be seen, done what needs to be done,
Now to town I have went, home I shall go.
Tuesday 3 November 2009
The Nature of Reality
Hey folks. Today I thought I'd blog about a theory of reality and consciousness that holds a lot of water. Through a You Tube account and an online blog by Darryl Sloan, I have learnt many things from this guy about the nature of reality and consciousness. I have yet to wrap the whole thing round my head, but I have acquired plenty of information to blog about...I hope.
So, let's start off with thinking about who you are, and what you should or should not believe. To begin, think about Chritianity as a religion. It effectively brainwashes people into believing that there is a God, Jesus Christ died on a cross to save us from our sins and that there is such a place as heaven and hell. There is no solid, firm proof that this all occured, and unless a believable arguement is put forward, how can we make our own judgement? Many adults present this information to their children at a very young age when they cannot create an informed decision themselves. I know that for a fact, as it happened to me.
Next, lets go down the scientific route, which consists of believing that you are just a brain inside a body, the world is just physics and that there is a big universe out there, and just a 'little you'. Thinking that when you die, that is just the end completly and that there is no afterlife. This lifestyle can be very depressing and unfulfilling as Darryl pointed out, he himself went down that route.
He also explained that you need to destroy the foundations of these beliefs that were built in your childhood, and start again. Asking yourself questions and reading between the lines.
To prove that the scientific way of living was inadequate, Darryl decided to try do telekinesis, which is basically moving an object (or in his case a psi wheel) with the mind, or rather consciousness. It was very sucessful and he did all sorts of experiments with static, heat and air to prove that he was the one moving the psi wheel. This proved that because he moved the psi wheel with his consciousness and defied the laws of physics, that the scientific way was incorrect. He did not do this in an occult way or for occult reasons, he did it purely scientifically.
This whole exerience of learning from him has taught me some valuable lessons. I think I'm gradually getting there, and I will keep my mind open and ask myself questions.
Now, I can't put into words the rest of his theory (yet), so I advise you to check out his You Tube account and online blog.
http://www.youtube.com/user/darrylsloan
So, let's start off with thinking about who you are, and what you should or should not believe. To begin, think about Chritianity as a religion. It effectively brainwashes people into believing that there is a God, Jesus Christ died on a cross to save us from our sins and that there is such a place as heaven and hell. There is no solid, firm proof that this all occured, and unless a believable arguement is put forward, how can we make our own judgement? Many adults present this information to their children at a very young age when they cannot create an informed decision themselves. I know that for a fact, as it happened to me.
Next, lets go down the scientific route, which consists of believing that you are just a brain inside a body, the world is just physics and that there is a big universe out there, and just a 'little you'. Thinking that when you die, that is just the end completly and that there is no afterlife. This lifestyle can be very depressing and unfulfilling as Darryl pointed out, he himself went down that route.
He also explained that you need to destroy the foundations of these beliefs that were built in your childhood, and start again. Asking yourself questions and reading between the lines.
To prove that the scientific way of living was inadequate, Darryl decided to try do telekinesis, which is basically moving an object (or in his case a psi wheel) with the mind, or rather consciousness. It was very sucessful and he did all sorts of experiments with static, heat and air to prove that he was the one moving the psi wheel. This proved that because he moved the psi wheel with his consciousness and defied the laws of physics, that the scientific way was incorrect. He did not do this in an occult way or for occult reasons, he did it purely scientifically.
This whole exerience of learning from him has taught me some valuable lessons. I think I'm gradually getting there, and I will keep my mind open and ask myself questions.
Now, I can't put into words the rest of his theory (yet), so I advise you to check out his You Tube account and online blog.
http://www.youtube.com/user/darrylsloan
Friday 30 October 2009
A collaboration poem
Indeed. In today's blog, I thought I'd show you a poem that a fellow You Tuber and I did. It's called 'Look To The Stars'. Please visit either, www.youtube.com/user/fellowtuber123 or www.youtube.com/user/Joshbuckler to see our collaboration video.
Look to the Stars
The moon bound all power in my eyes that night.
The sky was completely black. It was entirely white.
The streetlamps were muted in the evening mist.
There's a speck on the sidewalk, thought to not exist:
A point among and beneath unremarkable specks
that can't spit into rage at the encircling disconnect.
Warm, pure breaths stab harsh, cool air,
Nothing in the world can expunge my despair.
Dustbins placed on the edge of the street,
No one's around. Only thoughts to defeat,
Somebody's begging me to kindly knock them down.
So I make my statement before the sleeping town.
None have held strong faces in an empty room,
They worry themselves for the impending doom.
So light yourself a cigarette, pour a glass of wine,
You're only tying knots with your hand-made twine.
And melt through the walls of your cage. It is, after all, a lie.
A toast to the man in the tower, and one for the moon in the sky.
That won't heal the wound; it'll cushion the fall.
You'll just trip, tumble then cry out and crawl.
Yet you will not be finished, you will not be killed.
A maker starts beneath the ground, all structures to rebuild.
You are much stronger than they think you are,
Keep your eyes focused and look to the stars.
Look to the Stars
The moon bound all power in my eyes that night.
The sky was completely black. It was entirely white.
The streetlamps were muted in the evening mist.
There's a speck on the sidewalk, thought to not exist:
A point among and beneath unremarkable specks
that can't spit into rage at the encircling disconnect.
Warm, pure breaths stab harsh, cool air,
Nothing in the world can expunge my despair.
Dustbins placed on the edge of the street,
No one's around. Only thoughts to defeat,
Somebody's begging me to kindly knock them down.
So I make my statement before the sleeping town.
None have held strong faces in an empty room,
They worry themselves for the impending doom.
So light yourself a cigarette, pour a glass of wine,
You're only tying knots with your hand-made twine.
And melt through the walls of your cage. It is, after all, a lie.
A toast to the man in the tower, and one for the moon in the sky.
That won't heal the wound; it'll cushion the fall.
You'll just trip, tumble then cry out and crawl.
Yet you will not be finished, you will not be killed.
A maker starts beneath the ground, all structures to rebuild.
You are much stronger than they think you are,
Keep your eyes focused and look to the stars.
Monday 26 October 2009
Liking My Own Company
It feels rather odd to say this, but I personally enjoy my own company. Before anyone jumps to conclusions and thinks that I'm some sort of loner, I do like to be around friends and family. But it seems that over the years I've grown to like my own company more and more.
I live in a family of five (myself included). Therefore I'm always around people and theirs ways, plus the fact that I'm in school roughly six hours a day means that I'm in constant contact with others. When I was younger, basically a toddler, I would have obviously needed to be around some sort of adult most of the time, i.e aroud my parents or relatives. Because if they weren't there, I could've hurt myself etc. But now that I'm older, I'm more independent and I can look after myself. So obviously my parents trust me to be on my own and have a little more privacy.
Being around my family gets annoying sometimes. Of course I love them and couldn't live without them, but every now and then I wish I just lived in my own house somewhere else. I suppose it's only natural to feel this way as we all need time to ourselves every once in a while...
But there's more reasons why I spend most of my time by myself doing what I want to do. It's because my family and friends don't really share my interests, so when I'm around them I just get bored and go do my own thing. Usually that would entail writing some poetry/short stories, reading, going for a cycle or playing guitar. That's not always the case though. Sometimes I do enjoy things my family do.
Some my argue I'll end up being a depressed loner, but I have to disagree. I believe I'm strong enough to control the balance between the company of myself and the company of others.
I live in a family of five (myself included). Therefore I'm always around people and theirs ways, plus the fact that I'm in school roughly six hours a day means that I'm in constant contact with others. When I was younger, basically a toddler, I would have obviously needed to be around some sort of adult most of the time, i.e aroud my parents or relatives. Because if they weren't there, I could've hurt myself etc. But now that I'm older, I'm more independent and I can look after myself. So obviously my parents trust me to be on my own and have a little more privacy.
Being around my family gets annoying sometimes. Of course I love them and couldn't live without them, but every now and then I wish I just lived in my own house somewhere else. I suppose it's only natural to feel this way as we all need time to ourselves every once in a while...
But there's more reasons why I spend most of my time by myself doing what I want to do. It's because my family and friends don't really share my interests, so when I'm around them I just get bored and go do my own thing. Usually that would entail writing some poetry/short stories, reading, going for a cycle or playing guitar. That's not always the case though. Sometimes I do enjoy things my family do.
Some my argue I'll end up being a depressed loner, but I have to disagree. I believe I'm strong enough to control the balance between the company of myself and the company of others.
Sleep Talker
Unfortunately I share a room with my older sister, Chloe. We sleep in a bunk bed, Chloe’s on the top, and I’m on the bottom. Chloe often complains to me about my snoring in the night. Obviously, I can’t help this, and often I don’t snore. Usually, if I am though, Chloe would yell down to me and tell me shut up. Charming, eh? I would reply in sleepy groans and flop back to sleep.
But just over the past few months, Chloe has told me that instead of snoring, I’ve been sleep talking. One night, she told me I was blurting out random words like, “Grass! Colour! Dog!” On another occasion, she said that I was talking about something rather disturbing and creepy. She’s never told me what it was though, and I’m not sure I want to find out.
I want to know the cause of this. Personally, I thought that I must have something on my mind. But I never lose sleep over anything, everything’s fine in school, my family life is perfect and I’m not having any friend troubles. It’s very peculiar.
I’ve researched it a bit more the hope that I can get some answers to my questions. A website has told me that in lighter stages of sleep, you are more likely to be capable of speech, whereas in a deeper sleep you are limited to just moans and groans. It states that the causes of sleep talking can be anxiety disorders, strain, and fevers, none of which I’m aware that applies to me. Below is a piece from the website:
“What are the causes of sleep talking?
Sleep talking may be associated with:
• Psychiatric disorders such as anxiety disorders.
• Medical disorders like febrile illness (fever).
• Sleep disorders such as obstructive apnoea syndrome, sleep walking, or REM sleep behaviour”
Taken from http://www.buzzle.com/articles/sleep-talking.html
I just don’t understand it. I’m not going to worry about it too much though, it’s not really a big deal to me, but I am curious…
But just over the past few months, Chloe has told me that instead of snoring, I’ve been sleep talking. One night, she told me I was blurting out random words like, “Grass! Colour! Dog!” On another occasion, she said that I was talking about something rather disturbing and creepy. She’s never told me what it was though, and I’m not sure I want to find out.
I want to know the cause of this. Personally, I thought that I must have something on my mind. But I never lose sleep over anything, everything’s fine in school, my family life is perfect and I’m not having any friend troubles. It’s very peculiar.
I’ve researched it a bit more the hope that I can get some answers to my questions. A website has told me that in lighter stages of sleep, you are more likely to be capable of speech, whereas in a deeper sleep you are limited to just moans and groans. It states that the causes of sleep talking can be anxiety disorders, strain, and fevers, none of which I’m aware that applies to me. Below is a piece from the website:
“What are the causes of sleep talking?
Sleep talking may be associated with:
• Psychiatric disorders such as anxiety disorders.
• Medical disorders like febrile illness (fever).
• Sleep disorders such as obstructive apnoea syndrome, sleep walking, or REM sleep behaviour”
Taken from http://www.buzzle.com/articles/sleep-talking.html
I just don’t understand it. I’m not going to worry about it too much though, it’s not really a big deal to me, but I am curious…
My Future
I'm at the stage where a lot teachers in school put pressure on you to decide what career you would like to do in the future. In order for me to grow up to earn good money, but do what I enjoy, I've been thinking about my career options more seriously as when I come to do my GCSE's I'll need to have some sort of plan in mind.
So here are the career choices that I have picked:
1/ A graphics designer.
OR
2/ An English teacher (high school)
I've researched them a bit on this great website called, 'FastTomato.com'. It lets you fill out a questionaire about what you like etc, and then gives you a number of jobs that would best suit you. You can click on the options for what the job entails and it also tells you what subjects and grades you'll need to get at GCSE and A level to become one.
Being a graphics designer is my main option. I love art and design, computers, TD and I've got lots of ideas. My cousins husbund's a graphics designer and he owns his own business. Appartently he earns a lot of money designing websites for different clients. I'm quite excited about it.
My second option you'll see is an English teacher. I have a great passion for English and have enjoyed the subject since I was in primary school. I think if my graphics designer job didn't pan out alright I would have this job to fall back on.
Either way, I know what I want for my life, and that's always good, but I'm difinately open to change. But for now, I think I'll just continue being a teenager poet, life's too short to let my child-like thoughts fade away.
Naomi
So here are the career choices that I have picked:
1/ A graphics designer.
OR
2/ An English teacher (high school)
I've researched them a bit on this great website called, 'FastTomato.com'. It lets you fill out a questionaire about what you like etc, and then gives you a number of jobs that would best suit you. You can click on the options for what the job entails and it also tells you what subjects and grades you'll need to get at GCSE and A level to become one.
Being a graphics designer is my main option. I love art and design, computers, TD and I've got lots of ideas. My cousins husbund's a graphics designer and he owns his own business. Appartently he earns a lot of money designing websites for different clients. I'm quite excited about it.
My second option you'll see is an English teacher. I have a great passion for English and have enjoyed the subject since I was in primary school. I think if my graphics designer job didn't pan out alright I would have this job to fall back on.
Either way, I know what I want for my life, and that's always good, but I'm difinately open to change. But for now, I think I'll just continue being a teenager poet, life's too short to let my child-like thoughts fade away.
Naomi
'The X-Factor' Rant
Let's pretend you are a typical teenage human being. You go to school on a Monday morning and enter your form class just as the bell rings. You sit down on your usual seat, when you're surrounded by fellow classmates who suddenly start babbling about 'The X-Factor' o Saturday night. The girls are excited about a cute boy who's a contestant, while the boys are constantly talking about how hot Cheryl Cole is.
This is what I have to deal with frequently in my school life. If you don't know what 'The X-Factor' is, it's a singing competition television programme, where normal people from the public in the United Kingdom can enter to show off their good (or in some cases, not so good) voices to the judges, and the viewers at home.
For some strange reason, mainly young people sit in their living rooms and watch this crap every single year. I've seen it all before, and I'm tired of watching cocky, annoying people try to sing. Now, admittingly, there are some good singers who were featured on the show, but I just can't bear to watch it any longer. People get so obsessed with it and I can never understand how they can even THINK about getting to that state. Instead being outdoors, or socialising, these people are glued to their televison screens watching amateurs standing on a stage.
I hate it.
This is what I have to deal with frequently in my school life. If you don't know what 'The X-Factor' is, it's a singing competition television programme, where normal people from the public in the United Kingdom can enter to show off their good (or in some cases, not so good) voices to the judges, and the viewers at home.
For some strange reason, mainly young people sit in their living rooms and watch this crap every single year. I've seen it all before, and I'm tired of watching cocky, annoying people try to sing. Now, admittingly, there are some good singers who were featured on the show, but I just can't bear to watch it any longer. People get so obsessed with it and I can never understand how they can even THINK about getting to that state. Instead being outdoors, or socialising, these people are glued to their televison screens watching amateurs standing on a stage.
I hate it.
I'll give you a little taster...
Below is one of my more recent poems that I wrote...two days ago. My poetry isn't always as dark and rather as gothic as this, but I do ocassionaly dip into that style. Feel free to comment on my poem, as it's always good to get feedback.
I Kissed the Face of Death
Vomiting blood from my froth corrupted lungs on the ground,
He stands tall and watches me, the obscene mess, my head held down.
The Angel of Darkness kneels down beside me and whispers in my ear,
His words pollute my mind, and fills my psyche with fear.
Thoughts like thunderous explosions, hammering inside my head,
They turn my insides out, stolen soul, I am the living dead.
He touches me with blood stained hands, kisses me with bittersweet lips,
Try to escape but he enthrals me, his hands slide down my back to my hips.
Running his black nails through my hair, pushing me against the wall,
His tongue feeling round my mouth, over my body his fingers crawl.
My arms wrap round his broad shoulders, I give just as much in return,
I want his sour sweetness to remain in my mouth, his presence I yearn.
My lips are bleeding, my lungs feel tight, as he continues to osculate me,
His touch is torture, the pain unbearable, but I can not cease, can not flee.
It’s as if he’s clamped to my body, as if we were born conjoined at the hip,
The afflict of his affection on my mind and body, stinging like a whip.
After his constant attention, his perverted love, he finally slows down,
It seemed to last for hours, he and I had sweat across on our crowns.
But he held just as tight, possessive almost, while he stared at me with depth,
As I looked into his hypnotising eyes, I could not hold it in, I wept.
His ice cold skin touching mine as I breathe heavy, uneasy breaths,
My face, inches from his, his yellow eyes putting mine to the test.
He gives me one last kiss, so long and violent it’s left me without a breath,
As he turned away his draft of sweat lingered, I kissed the face of death.
And now I hunger with such lust for that kiss to touch my lips once again,
With me his seducing silence will forever in my mind remain.
Delicious movements tickling each other’s obscene person,
Whoever’s body he affectionately touches, that lust will eternally worsen.
I Kissed the Face of Death
Vomiting blood from my froth corrupted lungs on the ground,
He stands tall and watches me, the obscene mess, my head held down.
The Angel of Darkness kneels down beside me and whispers in my ear,
His words pollute my mind, and fills my psyche with fear.
Thoughts like thunderous explosions, hammering inside my head,
They turn my insides out, stolen soul, I am the living dead.
He touches me with blood stained hands, kisses me with bittersweet lips,
Try to escape but he enthrals me, his hands slide down my back to my hips.
Running his black nails through my hair, pushing me against the wall,
His tongue feeling round my mouth, over my body his fingers crawl.
My arms wrap round his broad shoulders, I give just as much in return,
I want his sour sweetness to remain in my mouth, his presence I yearn.
My lips are bleeding, my lungs feel tight, as he continues to osculate me,
His touch is torture, the pain unbearable, but I can not cease, can not flee.
It’s as if he’s clamped to my body, as if we were born conjoined at the hip,
The afflict of his affection on my mind and body, stinging like a whip.
After his constant attention, his perverted love, he finally slows down,
It seemed to last for hours, he and I had sweat across on our crowns.
But he held just as tight, possessive almost, while he stared at me with depth,
As I looked into his hypnotising eyes, I could not hold it in, I wept.
His ice cold skin touching mine as I breathe heavy, uneasy breaths,
My face, inches from his, his yellow eyes putting mine to the test.
He gives me one last kiss, so long and violent it’s left me without a breath,
As he turned away his draft of sweat lingered, I kissed the face of death.
And now I hunger with such lust for that kiss to touch my lips once again,
With me his seducing silence will forever in my mind remain.
Delicious movements tickling each other’s obscene person,
Whoever’s body he affectionately touches, that lust will eternally worsen.
Welcome to my new blog!
My name is Naomi and I'm a teenager. I've been writing poetry in a more serious way for approximately three years.
I started a You Tube account just over a year ago under the name of 'fellowtuber123', where I displayed my poetry videos that included visual footage to entertain my viewers. So far, it's been more of a success than I could ever have imagined, and I've made many like-minded friends in the process.
To publisize my work a little more, I decided that I'd create my very own blog to post my poetry on (among other types of blog posts). Here, my work will be organised and I can track in later years what I happened to be doing at a certain time.Overall, it should be a rather fun experience, and I hope to keep up the vlogging in the future.If you can, please visit my You Tube account to view my performances of my poems. (fellowtuber123)
Thank you,
Naomi
I started a You Tube account just over a year ago under the name of 'fellowtuber123', where I displayed my poetry videos that included visual footage to entertain my viewers. So far, it's been more of a success than I could ever have imagined, and I've made many like-minded friends in the process.
To publisize my work a little more, I decided that I'd create my very own blog to post my poetry on (among other types of blog posts). Here, my work will be organised and I can track in later years what I happened to be doing at a certain time.Overall, it should be a rather fun experience, and I hope to keep up the vlogging in the future.If you can, please visit my You Tube account to view my performances of my poems. (fellowtuber123)
Thank you,
Naomi
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